Category: FOR THEM <3

Dear beautiful, little humans, I have perfectly created to be imperfect….

Today, I begin an alphabetic journey I would like to share with you. Remember, this is only based on my experience, and I hope that you can grow and walk in your own light, remaining humble yet secure in the choices you make.

A is for ACCOUNTABILITY. You are accountable for your actions and reactions. These may impact or influence others. And, although you are not required to justify your decisions to others, communication, understanding, and patience is imperative for us to work together as a community.

A is for AFFIRMATION. As you grow and develop, I hope you embrace the time to reflect and declare your own affirmations. These are important for balancing your emotions and will encourage positive pathways for you. In the meantime, I will continue to express and showcase my availability to you for emotional support. Remember, we are all individually made beautiful. Our weaknesses, another’s strength and vice versa. Listen closely and continue to discover who you are, and through it all…remember to love yourself.

A is for AWARENESS. Please be aware that YOU matter FIRST! Your well-being must be placed before others. BUT, please be aware that without others, your well-being can never be placed. Be aware of your own journey. Where you are on your journey. Where you plan to go. Accepting any variances in your course. Reflecting on how far you have come; physically, mentally, emotionally, financially and what is important for YOU to feel at peace.

A is for AFFORDABILITY. I am not referring to your financial status, although that may be relevant for you depending on your life choices. When I am referring to affordability, it is important for you to assess what can you afford? What are you willing to release in order to make gains? This can be viewed as your own internal bartering system. What are your core values, and where are you prepared to shift the balance (one of my B words) in order to evoke self progression?

A is for ADVENTURE. When you are adventurous, not necessarily seeking the physical desire to go on an adventure, but when you are open and welcoming to new adventures, you embrace and encourage growth. You must be adventurous, in order to develop. Step out of your comfort zones and explore the world around you. Seek new challenges to overcome. Utilise the easier terrain to re-plan, rejuvenate and navigate future paths. If you become too accustomed to settling in comfort, you omit the opportunity to extend. Learn to find comfort in your discomfort. Adventure await…..

Stay tuned for my FIVE ‘B’ words to help you during your self-development. Simply from a loving mother, to her five beautiful boys.

I see you, with your gummy smile! A beautiful exchange of appreciation between you and I.

I see you, chattering away to inanimate objects. Exploring your world around you, and it’s boundaries.

I see you, arching your back! Refusing to sit or roll and opting to stand instead.

I see you, mesmerised by the world around you. Watching and processing the objects in view.

I see you, yawning, rubbing your face back and forth against my chest, pulling on your ears. It’s time for sleep my baby.

I see you, drooling profusely and gnawing on your little fists. Soon your gummy smile will be filled with sharp, chomping teeth!

I see you, grabbing everything within your reach. Your hand-eye coordination developing more and more each day.

I hear you, screeching at the top of your lungs. A new day full of surprises and you’re full of energy, conversation and songs to sing!

I hear you, giggling away at the things that fill your soul with happiness. Your world so pure and untainted.

I hear you crying, communicating you are in need. I am right here ready to fulfil those needs.

I hear you chatting away. Telling me all the details of your story and what a beautiful journey you are taking me on.

I hear you, sucking away as you feed. Reassurance that you are content and receiving substance.

I can sit here and watch you all day because one day you’ll be walking out the front door with a family of your own.

I can sit here disregarding time and take in your baby smell because one day your smell will change and my receipt may not be so welcoming.

I can sit here omitting sleep to nurse you, because one day you won’t need me as you develop your independence.

I can hold you in my warm embrace until my arms ache, because I know how fast you’ll be out of them and I’ll be desperate to hold onto you!

I can listen to every sound you make, every story you tell, every giggle shared because I know that these moments will be less frequent as you gain more experience and relationships with others.

But the one thing that can never be replaced, never diminish, never transform, is my unconditional, overly abundant, immeasurable, immense love for you!! You kids are my all, you fill me with pride each and every day. You collectively define life, and I couldn’t think of any others to share it with. I am eternally and sincerely grateful. I am blessed!!

(Part 2)

At present, you are the tender ages of 8, 6, 4 and just shy of 2, but yet I feel prompted to share these key points of advice. Yes, I’m disclosing what I’ve learnt through experience in the hopes you manifest healthy relationships in your, very distant, future years.

I have been procrastinating in delivering this blog, as if it’s the final chapter, disregarding the fact that it’s ONLY Part 2 in my memoirs to you! So here we go, on my conquest to keep you seemingly informed, in my opinion, here’s my suggestions:-

01.
Communication is Key

Talk about every and anything. Nothing should be off limits with the right person. Set goals together, and confide in each other. Transparency is key. Build an unbreakable bond where trust can not be doubted nor questioned. Most importantly ask your partner daily “How are you?” When they answer, listen, and listen intently.

02.
Share the Workload

Share it all. This includes, but is not limited to, the mental, physical, psychological, and financial workloads. Discuss an achievable balance where each partner feels supported and valued. We all inhibit strengths and weaknesses. If we can discuss them, and support each other where needed the relationship will have an indestructible foundation.

03.
Take the Initiative

Don’t wait to be asked or instructed. Open your eyes and view what needs to be done. Actions speak louder than words.

04.
Fill Your Partner’s Cup

In a selfless manner. Yes, that means don’t fill your partner’s cup with things that fill yours. Also, accept that it is impossible to pour from an empty cup – this applies to both parties!

05.
You Both are Priority

Make sure to find time to connect or reconnect it is important. Value your time together.

06.
Accept Responsibility and Accountability

Just like it takes two to tango, it takes two to share in sustaining and maintaining a relationship. Multiple hands create light work.

07.
Love and Laughter are Well Partnered

Make sure there is ample of both!!

08.
Don’t Just Dream…DO!

Verbalising your dreams without exerting effort to make them come true only leads to feelings of disappointment. The world needs more dreamers who do, opposed to dreamers who don’t.

09.
Love Your Family and Friends

They are important. They’ll support you through the peaks and troughs of any relationship. Having separate friendships is also imperative, this increases individual support systems, which are crucial.

10.
It’s OK to Show Emotion

You haven’t lost your masculinity because you’ve shed a tear. However, it is important to dry those tears and carry on. Life’s too short for prolonged sorrow.

11.
Love and Be Loved

Open your heart, both unrestrained and unrestricted, and share it. Even through loss we learn. I hope for an eternal love full of happiness for you all, one in which you feel wholesome and unquestionably secure.

I am certain this list is endless, but here’s a start. Part 2 complete, at least for now!

This is me (Part I)

It’s been awhile since my last blog post and I have been feeling partially guilty, and to be honest, completely too busy to even gather my thoughts. To simply take a moment to recollect the present, to exhale the contemplations and inhale the prospects. So tonight, I omit the excuses to collate and I regurgitate my thoughts as they simultaneously enter my mind. So excuse the rough draft, this is utterly raw and uncut.

My dear sons, there are going to be so many blog posts I’m hoping I’ll be given the opportunity to dedicate to you. Some prompting social etiquette, personal hygiene, my hopes and dreams for you and most importantly my love for you. But in this post, this post I want to bare a little more of my soul so you are aware of who I am, yes me, your mother. Not as the person that was your personal chauffeur, your nanny, the cleaner, the housewife, the dance studio owner, the student, the employee, the listener, the friend, the mother….but as Kristin!

My dear sons, I have lived. I’ve traveled across many seas from America and Canada for school, dance trips, holidays, ski school, gymnastics, to Haiti for missionary work, to London to study and live, throughout Europe, to than Australia. If there was fun to be had along the way, I’ve had it. I’ve welcomed all walks of life with open arms. I’ve dismissed the stereotypes, the generalisations, the castings and most importantly the judgements of others reluctant to dismiss negativity and bitterness themselves. I loved life in every sense and I made sure you were along my side for every part of the adventure. I spent my 20s selfishly, and why not? I assumed I had the later years to have kids, so I partied and threw caution to the wind like I suppose many my age did (although that didn’t sway my desires). I envisioned having my first child at 30, and I did. I may have only envisioned one child (that being a girl) neither of which came to fruition but I wouldn’t change it for the world! I was blessed with four well mannered, very handsome boys! Four boys I call my own. Four boys I carried within me and birthed naturally via waterbirth. K Boyz I-IV you changed my world, I know so cliché, but you did, and through all the frustrations I face daily as a parent, I am comforted in the blessings of having you.

So my dear sons, this is Part I of my letters to you. Your mother who loved with her all even through adversity. Who continued to give, even when many times it may have gone unnoticed. Who chose to lead her life with passion and chose to run a business giving everything she had because she loved those involved. Who always found a silver lining on a cloudy day. Who battled the urge to return home to Bermuda to be surrounded by an abundance of love from friends and family to provide you with more opportunities here. Who believed in people and their desire to grow. Who nurtured the many interests you shared as kids simply because I still enjoyed being a kid myself. Who every so often lost the flow to write but than found a spark hidden deep within. Who wore her disappointment of others until there was a need to simply remove the cloak. Who genuinely shared her support and love. My name is Kristin, I may have been blessed with four beautiful boys, but I was also blessed to simply be me!

Here we go again…